Yesterday morning (Jan.26th, 2017), after getting up and feeding my three lovely kitties, I went to look out the bay window and saw something frankly, I have never seen before. The weather was a bit gray and stormy looking but nothing major; the bay was a little churned up and slightly muddy looking, but again nothing intense. The sky was beautiful shades of gray and bluish gray and there seemed to be rays shining down on a particular spot right in front of our house. Then, I saw a radiant white fairly large blob (for lack of better words) floating under the rays. It seemed to be almost glowing, it was quite magnificent. It was too far away to take a photo; although, I hope to have that remedied soon with a birthday present that I have requested. I will be getting a tele-zooming lens that attaches to my iphone. Eeeeeeeeeeekkkk.....I am beyond excited. Anyways, so I kept looking at this intense white "raft" in the bay, and realized that it was a flock of gorgeous snow white birds banded together floating in unison as a raft-like structure. I could make out some individual birds around the edges, and I could spot various heads throughout the grouping. But, WOW what a spectacular sight. Honestly, I have never seen such a thing anywhere, much less in this area (Apalachicola Bay). Fortunately, I was able to share this experience with my Momma. If you know what type of birds these are, please do share in the comments section; I'd love to know. They didn't stay in front of our house more than maybe 10 minutes, or at least what I could see. They swam on up the bay line.
It was so interesting and honestly felt a bit magical. This image stayed with me all day long. I couldn't stop thinking about these birds. I got to thinking what does it mean? What can I gleam from this experience? How is this incredible sighting pertinent in my life? OK, yeah I know most people would just say it was a flock of birds. Whoop-tee-doo....right? Well, all I can say is WOW and this felt way more powerful than just a flock of birds, and that is what I TRUST- my instincts/ my intuition/ my gut. How can you cultivate yours? Where do you choose to receive Divine Guidance in your life? The immediate message that I heard being repeated to me was "it is an important time to connect, rely on, and contribute to your spiritual community; to operate in UNITY". OK, soooo WHOA!! Powerful right?! Well, this could apply to so many areas of our lives, the world, politics, environment.... I could go on and on, but I simply won't. This is not a political statement, but rather a message of LOVE and UNITY and building COMMUNITY. It is so important to step outside of the individual and to acknowledge that we are all in this together. I know I personally have a hard time with this concept, and it is something that I have been working on for quite a while. How can I shift from the NOTHINGNESS to ALLNESS?
Yesterday, I felt all kinds of out of sorts. I couldn't pinpoint what was wrong or why. I wasn't even sure it was all my own stuff. This is such a huge thing as an empath. (If you don't know what an empath is, I recommend looking up information by Judith Orloff.) I was up, showered, dressed, playing on the computer, connecting with facebook groups, but I felt like I simply couldn't function beyond that. I felt discombobulated in some ways, but present in others. I tried several tactics to pull myself out of this very bizarre state. I tried meditation, getting outside, fresh air, drawing, pulling tarot cards, and nothing seemed to work. So, what do you do? Well.... the only thing I could figure out to do was to acknowledge it, accept it, and try to surrender to it. Ask it, what can I learn from this state of being? What do I need to know? Not, sure I was fully capable of successfully doing these actions, but I tried. Learning how to watch and observe and not be wrapped up IN it, is sometimes a very big challenge for me to do. So, what next? Well, I have come to realize that sometimes the best way for me to get out of my own way is to allow processing and energy movement during sleep. So, yep, I passed out. Sleep was the right tool in this case, as I am feeling much better this morning. And I am STILL in AWE of the sight I saw yesterday.
The images above are sketches that I created to try and capture the essence of the sight I saw. At first (as a perfectionist), I was disappointed with these sketches. I sent them to a friend because we are doing a 5 minute daily sketch challenge. We are basically each others workout buddy for sketching. It is FABULOUS and wonderful to have someone to be accountable to, although really we are only being accountable to ourselves. The point of these sketches is to loosen up, to observe, to sketch, and to exercise our creative mind,to have fun, and rekindle the love that we have for drawing. They are not meant to be perfect. They are exercises. Anyways, it was so great to share them with her, because she reminded me to let go of my perfectionist tendencies and the idea that I had in my head of how these were "supposed" to look. She thought they were great and 'captured an essence and spirituality'. Well......isn't that what I was really going for all along?!! Such a great reminder to open up our perspective, see things from a different view, and most importantly to be OPEN. I had cut myself off to spite my own face, in some respects, by expecting them to be a certain way. Well, isn't that just too perfect!?! This is the exact concept I am working on in my own life. Just because I see things a certain way or that I believe they could be or should be "fair" or done in a certain manner, doesn't mean that there isn't beauty, lessons learned, or perfect just the way they are. This is something I have always battled with, yes Aquarius here. :)
So what now? Well, my intention and goal is to acknowledge, learn, grow, and proceed holding these lessons in my heart. I hope to REMEMBER them and APPLY them, but forgive and love myself if I don't. And if I have to learn these lessons again, well, I am grateful for the opportunity to learn, grow, and LOVE.